Archive for the ‘Friday Top 5’ Category

As explained in previous posts tribal stretching has gone on for centuries, and I just so happened to have stumbled across a few pictures of the tradition. And the awards for best tribal tapering goes to…..

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Mostly everyone’s heard the recent story about Kimberley Vlaminck, who went in for a tattoo and got 56 stars tattooed on her face only to then claim that she fell asleep during the tattoo and the artist tattooed too many on her. She later admitted she had lied and originally asked him for that many. But there are many many more cases of stupid people getting stupid tattoos in stupid tattoo shops… Here’s a few of them:

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Let’s play… spot the horrendous spelling mistake! 🙂

Tattoos are a pretty common these days but there’s a big difference between having a random butterfly tatt on your wrist and being covered from head to toe in the things… So this friday we pay homage to the top 5 fully covered well-known people:

1: KAT VON D

The obvious choice of tattooed ladies, but nonetheless still covered. This professional tattoo artist is no stranger to the inked world, and now has her own studio and makeup range.

 

2: TOMMY LEE

This tattooed Motley Crue member is pretty covered with well over 30 designs, including his sons names, his ex-girlfriends lipstick marks and MAYHEM on his stomach.

 

3: JEFREE STAR

Man? Woman? Who knows? Either way this musician/model/designer/micro internet celeb hybrid is almost covered from neck to toe in all kinds of designs.

 

4: TRAVIS BARKER

Blink 182 drummer Travis is tattooed, mohawked and pierced, so it would be stupid to not include him in the top 5. I wouldn’t be surprised if the combined pain of all his tattoos is enough to kill a small child.

 

5: DENNIS RODMAN

Hey, he’s weird, and I don’t think anyone knows where he’s disappeared to these days but he’s bloody covered in tatts!

Now I’m someone who’s got a fair share of ink and tatts, which all seemed like good ideas at the time (and don’t get me wrong, I still love all of them) but it’s just a fact that when you’re about to get a brand new addition to the ever-growing family of body mods there are certain things that piercers or tattoo artists don’t tell you. So to aid any distressed people out there pondering the unknown here’s this Friday’s Top 5:


1: ORAL PIERCINGS CHIP YOUR TEETH.

This is something that is virtually unavoidable, unless you’re inhumanly careful or don’t leave your lip ring bar in too long after it’s been pierced ( like someone I know… *cough*me*cough*). So far 6 chips in my teeth and counting – I’m aiming to look like a toothless sailor by the time I hit 30 🙂

 

2: STRETCHED EAR TUNNELS SMELL TERRIBLE.

When your ears are expanded excess dead skin builds up around your plugs making your ears smell like a hobo being sick on a dead rabid dog, unless you clean them every couple of weeks. Sounds lovely dunnit?

 

3: UNPROFESSIONAL PIERCERS = IDIOTIC.

I know going to a licensed piercing shop takes all the fun out of going down a back alley and getting a stranger to jab your ear with a paperclip, but seriously do it properly. DONT be an idiot and get your mates to pierce your ear for you DIY. You’ll regret it… Or maybe your ear will fall off.

 

4: SEPTUM WHAT?

Strangely enough septum piercings don’t hurt to get done – but only if you get it done by the right piercer who knows how to get the sweet spot – the bit of skin between the two bits of cartilage in your nose. Just don’t get a bloody moron to do it (see point #3).

 

5: TATTS ITCH LIKE F***

About a week after getting some new ink the skin dries and turns into a irritating scab-like thing that torments you day and nightly with it’s unbearable itchiness until you just want to scrub it off your skin with a brillo pad or a cheese grater or a porcupine. Ah the joys of tattoos…